maybe there will be calm
Calvin is a very angry young man and everyone who knows him can tell. He rages about something most days and lately when he rages he runs. Yesterday went like this
make a mistake, know you are in trouble, run,return, get spoken to and about not hurting siblings, go to room to cool off off, calm down, eat supper, help yourself to something you have already been told is for someone else, get caught, deny it, lie about it, run again, return, have parents try to talk to you about choices, ignore them, yell at them, try to run again, get sent to bed of frustration on part of parents, parent comes in to reassure you that you are loved, ignore them, tell them to go away, other parent tries same thing but now child is hiding under bed, Mama calms herself, puts on patient pants, talks you out and then you try to fold your huge almost 13 year old body into her lap ( as she sits on the floor because she was trying to get you out from under bed) while you have a long good cry about why your birth Mom would not change her life so she could keep you, finally go to bed, exhausted but maybe believing that you are loved.
It makes for really long days and with 3 kids all doing versions of this my time to do things like be here are so limited. I am tired, I am so ready for all of them to take a huge step in a new direction and Calvin needs to lead the way.